Sometimes, my brain does arts and crafts.

I was re-reading one of my blogs where I talk about how seatbelts saved my life. And seriously, reflecting on as much trouble as I have with asserting myself in like, every way, I have ZERO qualms about making people wear their seatbelts. And I truly thank my parents for nagging me about my seatbelt all those years, because otherwise I honestly do not believe I'd be here today.

So of course that sent my mind on a tangent (I know!), and I decided to compile more parenting advice! Since I have no experience of my own! But still, I kind of like my list!




My Top 13 Unsolicited Parenting Tips



1. Teach your kids to always say "Please" and "Thank you."

2. Drill it into them so that it becomes second nature for them to wear their seatbelts every single time they get into a car.

3. Make sure they know that no matter what, you love them with true agape love. And also hug them a lot.

4. Tell them that if something is ever worrying them, to not let it keep them up at night. That they can, no matter how late, come wake up Mom or Dad and you'll talk about it, and everything will be okay.

5. Tradeoff: The kid does the healthy thing and eats his/her vegetables and all that jazz, and you'll totally take him/her out for a junk food day once a month. Preferably in a place with a ball pit.

6. Don't let them watch "bad" movies. Yes, they're gonna watch them anyway behind your back. But it's your job to raise them with some semblance of right and wrong. Unless you're planning to discuss philosophy and ethics with them after the movie, just tell them no.

7. Because basically, one of the most important things is that it's a parent's job to make sure that their kid gets to be a kid. You. Parent. Them. Kid. Sometimes that means looking old and farty.

8. On that note...don't like, drink and smoke pot with your underaged child. What you have to understand is that it's so awkward, all around.

9. Be generous. That's a real live person you got there, and it's an amazing gift. I can barely afford my cats, let alone another human being, so I don't mean this to be insensitive to budgets, I just mean, let them know you have their back. Spring for the Lunchables® now and then. (But not too often, because they are TERRIBLE for you.)

10. If you spoil because you can, more power to you. Just make sure that the kids know that it's about giving. Teach them to be giving, too.

11. Be happy with yourself. Don't criticize your body in front of them, or obsess over your appearance or weight. Send the message that true beauty comes from within. And don't let your kids go on diets. Teach them how to be healthy.

12. Share your interests with them, but get into their interests. Your kid likes video games? Play them with him! Plants? Pick them...or read up on them or something! This shows them that they have the ability to be interesting people in their own right. Which MEANS, fewer unhealthy future sexual relationships! YAY!

13. Let them know that you're always proud of them, because of who they are, and not because of what they do. Acknowledge their accomplishments, but make sure they know it's THEM that you love.




©2007