Bratz Suckz

I wrote this in response to a bit in Sirens on what everyone knows, but no one will talk about -- the unsettling horror of Bratz dolls, and how they just won't go away:


I think the most obnoxious and troubling thing about the Bratz phenomenon is the whole concept of manufactured sexuality's being what -- and all -- girls should strive towards. I see such a simultaneously watered-down/pumped-up version of sexiness permeating young women's culture that it makes me want to throw a flat-heeled shoe at my television. Which came first, the chickenhead or the egg, is up for debate, but Bratz definitely reflects the mentality of the day.

Barbie was ridiculous, but in that head-cheerleader sort of way. She was every Molly Ringwald nemesis on the surface, but sometimes she had a heart of gold, and at the end of the day, even if you still wished you looked like Barbie, you could find solace in knowing that your brain helped texture your non-perfect looks, and that was cool -- better, even. Plus like (the author) said, sometimes Barbie was an astronaut.

Bratz? In my opinion is way more subversively harmful. Because Barbie represented a very specific, unattainable beauty that at least if you didn't have, you could realize that and get on with your day. Bratz IS ethnically diverse, so the dolls DO send the message: "No matter what your cultural heritage, here is your one-stop-shop on The Rules Of Being Hot." And it's like that creepy scene in "Mean Girls" where Rachel McAdams's prepubescent sister is gyrating to Kelis. Barbie had big boobs, but gave off an air of innocence. Bratz dolls send the message that all girls have to do to rock in this world is wear revealing clothing, pile on a shitload of makeup, and of course -- and most obnoxiously -- cop an attitude.

I may be "old," but my sister is 16, and I am horrified on a consistent basis, seeing the crap girls get fed, watching how self-consciously they dumb themselves down in order to be considered "cute." And that's not exactly a new thing, but when paired with a "Be a bitch! Oh, and try and look like a hooker, mmkay and tHe b0yzzz wIlL LUVVVV u" guide on how to conquer the world with your meaningless vagina? Well, my skin crawls and my brain melts with fear for the future.

In summation: Bratz sucks balls. Figuratively. And if someone doesn't smack 'em upside the head and force them to -- in no particular order -- read a book, eat a sandwich, and put some clothes on -- literally. Sexuality is a potentially beautiful thing, but as with art, you need to study and learn the real thing backwards and forwards before you can try to harness it and make it your own.




©2007