"A Lifetime's Not Too Long To Live As Friends."

Imagine my amusement when I discovered that once again, late-evening CW11 has tried to get off My List for cancelling "Gilmore Girls" while retaining the abominable "One Tree Hill." They are doing this by picking their episodes based on things I have talked about earlier in the day. For example, after I referred to Ross's "A PASTE," that very episode aired! Then, I was thanking Javier last night for making me believe in romance again (sawry sawry, I know, blech, but I like it!). So what do you know, but tonight's "Sex and the City" was all about the concept of romance! And seriously, it was, in my opinion, the best episode of the show ever.

In many ways, I hate the show and the weird ripple effect it had on society. I do blame "Sex and the City" in large part for the backwards, "If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em" attitude that "women" adopted towards "men." That basically suggested that fucking = power, and if women could only lose those pesky emotions and use their vaginas as voraciously yet disinterestedly in "men" use their penises, then we'd have achieved "feminism," only with better shoes.

And of course I am not down with that, in large part because I think it misses the whole point of feminism, but more specifically, because it in my opinion actually reverses it by separating ourselves, both men and women, from our bodies; that is, denying that our entire being -- body, spirit, heart, soul -- is connected to each other, and if you try to extract one, you cease to function as the best, strongest person you can be. Which is to make yourself weaker. And that is not feminism.

But at its best, "Sex and the City" could be a great show. In this episode, the one where Miranda and Steve get married, each of the four ladies gets to shine in her own way. Carrie manages to be sweet towards a boyfriend, while not getting eclipsed by him. Charlotte...well, Charlotte has her perfect romantic dream date and then...gets diarrhea. But it's actually sweet, 'cause I mean, it's Charlotte, and she really can't not be adorable, first of all, plus it's nice, because if you love someone after a night of Montezuma's Revenge, I think that is really awesome, and of course is made easier by having a huge place with two bathrooms, but anyway, it was nice in the end.

And Samantha goes for a boob job, and finds out that she has breast cancer. And it is heartbreaking.

And Miranda proposes to Steve, and they have one of the best weddings I've ever seen, planned in a week, and Miranda wears a red dress, and it's a traditional and beautiful ceremony, but not cookie-cutter. And Cynthia Davis is just luminous the entire episode without losing Miranda's edge. I loved watching Steve and Miranda's relationship over the years, as they learned that fine art of comprising and evolving without changing, and finally just wanted to be together forever because it wasn't the next leap, but the next step.

But what really set this one apart for me as definitely up there on my list of Best Any Show Episode Ever, was that the show did what it did BEST. It focused on the amazing, complex friendships among the four of them. They all had their own strong plotlines, but what was nice is that you see how sometimes those are the times they not only need each other most, but are able to get over themselves enough to give.

The results are incredible. Although the episode ends kind of heartbreakingly, it's the heartbreak that makes it beautiful, watching the four of them sit together at a table for four, with their martinis held high, toasting Samantha's life as much as Miranda's new one with Steve. And that was how everyone wanted it. It was like a silent admission: "When life becomes bigger than us is exactly when we realize just how ready we are for it, as long as we are together."

And I realize that's a little end-of-sleepaway-camp, even for me (and DUDE! PLEASE, someone remind me to write about sleepaway camp!), but if Carrie is allowed to heavyhanded metaphor and self-analogize all over the place, then I think I should get to now and then, as compensation for owning no Manolo Blahniks.

Seriously, though. Tonight was a night that I was happy to watch "Sex and the City." Here were these women in their late '30s and '40s -- totally beautiful. Totally strong, Totally happy. Two married, one with a child, three with great careers, one with cancer. At that moment when they toasted, all of it was one shared experience for them, and they'd get through anything, because their love was that strong. And the episode was about romance, but about how it is truly the icing on the cake. Delicious on its own, but just not right without the foundation.

I am very blessed to have friends like that. I am very blessed to get to be a friend to friends like that, even though a lot of times I have my head up my own ass. Thank you to all of those "friends like that" that are reading, and just remember that we can get through anything together.

Lots of love.