Debbie Gibson's "Electric Youth": A Review!

"Electric Youth" was Debbie Gibson's second album. And see, I get that Debbie Gibson might be considered cheesy by some, but it always pisses me off when she gets lumped in with people like Britney Spears and Jessica Simpson and all those chicks from '99. Because she wrote all her songs, played guitar and piano, AND produced this entire album from her garage! And let us not forget the AMAZING Electric Youth perfume -- bright pink with an "electric" coil running through the middle! So let's review!


1. Who Loves Ya, Baby?

Synopsis: I totally have your back.

THEN: The chorus kind of got on my nerves, but I still liked it. Plus, the first time I heard it, I was so excited that the new album was out, that it felt full of promise.

NOW: I got the old excitement when this started! Awesome. And you can tell right off the bat that she came a long way from her first album. Still, the song doesn't do that much for me. And it goes on way too long.

GRADE: B-


2. Lost In Your Eyes

Synopsis: All that matters is that I'm so in love with you right now.

THEN: Pure, unadulterated love for this song. Please see: everything I've ever said about '80s ballads, but multiply it by A MILLION, because this is one of the most gorgeous songs EVER. I loved it so much that the first karaoke I ever did, I sang this song. And it went terribly. There is video evidence. You're not gonna see it. But I will tell you that I was wearing a baja and leggings, and had a perm.

NOW: Oh wow! I had no idea this came so soon on the album! Guys, this song is just great, plain and simple. One of the best love ballads ever. It's beautiful, it's simple, it just is awesome. And, I've discovered that this song has a huge fan base with guys! That means that they were all liking it back in the day and not admitting it. Which is awesome.

GRADE: A+


3. Love In Disguise

Synopsis: We're not together, but we still love each other, but we just act like we hate each other.

THEN:
I don't really remember much about this song except not liking it, especially coming right after "Lost in Your Eyes," it was a big letdown.

NOW: Wow, there's some electric guitar action going on here! This isn't bad so far...was I wrong to not like it back in the day? Well, it's okay. Not great, not bad. I don't have much to say about it, so I will take this opportunity to say that I really love bridges. I miss them. Back in the '80s, everything had a bridge! Are they considered uncool now? If so, why? What is uncool about a bridge? Bring back the bridge!

Okay, wow, this song is too repetitive in the end, like WE GET IT, Debbie!

GRADE: C+


4. Helplessly In Love

Synopsis: I miss you, and am gonna tell you like a hundred billion times.

THEN: I think that I hated this song for a long time, then one day it just SPOKE to me 'cause I was all in love with "Herbie," and he "hated (me)." True story! For another time!

NOW: This song is not great, but there's actually some really interesting stuff going on, and I admire her creativity. There's like, a bridge in the middle of the song! Then another bridge later on! Uh oh, here comes the "Melrose Place"-y song thing. Why did every song in the '80s have that?

GRADE: B-


5. Silence Speaks (A Thousand Words)

Synopsis: Dude, stop being a douchey coward just so I'LL break up with you and you don't have to get your hands dirty. (Part of that might be my own stuff.)

THEN: Ohhhhhhhhhhhh. This was AWESOME, because it had a FLUTE. I was so excited about this. And I loved the song. I remember Krysi had the album before I did, because her parents loved her more than mine did, and she came into school all "OMG! Best song ever!" and wrote out all the lyrics to this, and I was all, "So deep."

NOW: This is a really pretty song. And sad. Silence really DOES speak a thousand words.

GRADE: A-


6. Should've Been The One

Synopsis: It should've been you, with me.

THEN: THIS song has a lot of relevance to my past. First of all, it was another one of my songs for Herbie. Second, and most importantly, Krysi and I realized that this one part totally went with one of our cheers, and we would always do it, along with Shannon. "Here we go!" Debbie cried beforehand, and here we DID go.

NOW: Yay! This song is fun. And um, Shannon and I still do the cheer. Yes, we have hung around in the aughts, listening to Debbie Gibson, and cheering. Shut up.

GRADE: B+


7. Electric Youth

Synopsis: Debbie believes the children are our future.

THEN: Hahaha oh man. This song...classic. And I will tell you a secret now. I set out to learn the entire dance from this video. Because it RULED. That didn't end up happening, but I could do the whole beginning part. Maybe it's not too late to learn the rest! This video was so, so awesome. Crazy, synchronized dancing! Wooooooooo!!!

NOW: YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! What can I say to possibly do justice to this? I can't! So just imagine all the energy in the world in song form and that is how I feel about this.

GRADE: A


8. No More Rhyme

Synopsis: We've never had any real problems, or had to lose each other, so what happens if our complacency ultimately drives us apart?

THEN:
I loved this song. So pretty. Plus! The video was in black and white! AND featured Danica Mckellar, AKA Winnie Cooper, playing...I think a cello? Some stringed instrument? Although, awesome as that is in and of itself, the video really didn't make a whole lot of sense, to be completely honest.

NOW: Another song that I just can't not still think is beautiful. And it's actually pretty deep, and you don't really hear songs about this kind of thing, which is cool.

GRADE: A-


9. Over The Wall

Synopsis: Once we get over this wall, we'll be all set.

THEN: I hated this song. It was stupid and repetitive and I just hated it.

NOW: Same.

GRADE: F


10. We Could Be Together

Synopsis: I'm with this guy, who's pretty safe and nice and all, but I LOVE you, and if you just say the word, I'm all yours.

THEN: Wow, I loved this song! And, I know this is going to shock you, but wait for it -- it reminded me of a boy! I loved the lyrics.

NOW: It's still decent, but hasn't aged great, especially now that I know the acoustic version, which we'll get into later. BUT, it still has two bridges, and y'all know how I feel about bridges!

GRADE: B


11. Shades Of The Past

Synopsis: Okay, enough pussyfooting around, are we together, or what!

THEN: I remember being at strong odds with Krysi (Debbie's other number one fan) about this song. She LOVED it, and I...did not.

NOW: I actually like the song more now than some of the others. Still don't love it, though.

GRADE: B-


11. We Could Be Together (Campfire Acoustic Mix)

Synopsis: Same as the original, but acoustic!

THEN: Okay, see, I originally just had the tape of "Electric Youth," and this was only on the CD, which I got later. BONUS! And I liked this version better. PLUS, I was learning how to play it on guitar!

NOW: Same, but I could do without all the echoey stuff going on. But like I said, it pretty much ruined the original version for me.

GRADE: B+


12. No More Rhyme (Acoustic Mix)

Synopsis: Same as the original, but...same as the original.

THEN: I remember thinking this was a pretty redundant version. It is not an acoustic mix! All it is, is missing the stringed instruments! That's not the same!

NOW: Its still such a beautiful song though <333 And although it's not acoustic, I think I might like this version better now! Wow, scratch that. I definitely like it better! Nice.

GRADE: A-


©2006

Real World Key West: The Wrap-Up

For some reason, I've written more about "The Real World: Key West," arguably the most unsatisfying season of "The Real World," than any other. So, in the spirit of completion, I present to you:

Notes On The Wrap-Up (started a few minutes late)

- Okay, why (WHY) is Tyler more charming in the first 30 seconds than he was all season?

- OMG a dead rat! Already, more interesting than the entire season.

- Tyler: "As if we needed proof (that we're filthy) -- look around us!" Awesome.

- Damn, Svetlana looks GORGEOUS. Holy crap! I always thought she was pretty, but the one detraction was her perpetual "duhhhh" face. She needed more wind machines and hairdressers, I guess, 'cause...PRETTY!

- Paula: "I'm not dirty! I'm messy!" YES, there is a big distinction, thanks, Paula, and, weird eye makeup notwithstanding, I'm glad to see you looking healthier and humorous.

- Janelle, you look pretty and relaxed, too! Geez, what do they do? Give them all Xanax at the recap special? 'Cause, so far I like everyone like a BILLION times more!

- Okay. There is a random room full of tons of butterflies, dead and alive. Explain to me WHY this was not on the show! How randomly creepy!

- I lived through every single year of the '80s. Not once did I ever see a pair of hoop earrings as big as Janelle's.

- "Find out what happens when we stop being polite...and start being real," or whatever they say, and...? Svetlana's LOSING A TAMPON INSIDE HER BODY does not fit into that equation, HOW, exactly?

- Oh, hi, Jose! Sorry about your not getting a personality and all.

- Quote of the Year - Zach: "How's your vagina?"

- Expression of the Year - Tyler: ("I am soooo glad I don't EVER have to deal with those things.")

- Mad points to Zach, albeit creepy, if he was in any way serious when he kept reiterating: "I'll do it" (find Svetlana's MIA tampon).

- Madder points to Paula: for looking for it. I mean, I WOULD do that for a friend, if push came to shove? (No pun intended) But, good lord.

- WOW. They got footage of said search. And...huhhh, I'll save it for my last paragraph.

- Nice. Nice, gross editors. Very * subtle * switch, from Svetlana's Lost Tampon to her Lost Can Of Tuna.

- Okay, here is a scene of Tyler's being maybe mean? And usually they would hold the camera, pause, then switch to one of his bitchy confessionals. Here, they have him saying something sorta "mean" to Svet, then they keep the camera on him instead of switching over, and he looks really tongue-in-cheek, actually. And very cute. Grrrr. What is the truth?

- Okay, enough, MTV. They so obviously want to market Svetlana for their stuff. Commercials, challenges, I'm not sure, but it is a bit SILLY that she gets this whole Whitesnake video fanned-hair treatment. I mean, she's not my TYPE, but I've always stuck up for her as a pretty yet sheltered girl who got bullied, but I mean, come ON, enough with the (literal) fans!

- Erm...Tyler just said this whole thing about "I pay people to (do any/all heavy lifting required by the hurricanes)." I really want to think that he's being tongue in cheek now, but I just don't know. Confusing!

- Janelle: "I think I put like, a chair inside or something...I don't know.

- GUYS! PLEASE! (Please) tell me you're joking! I mean, you have to be, right? Back in the initial hurricane episode, I was totally down with the ignorance, 'cause, who knew? And now, I am always down with gallows humor, 'cause, you have to be, but...all right, I'll just keep watching.

- Well, hi, John, showing up just in time to be the token asshole! However, cringeworthy as it may be, his CHASING THE COPS for "street props" after they are trying to walk away from the dude they could have totally arrested for peeing against a wall??? -- AWESOME!!!
- Hmmm. John must have said something like, "Yeah, I don't want to do a Challenge," 'cause, don't get me wrong, he was never the brightest crayon in the shed, but he is getting BITCH editing right now.

- "I think the only fun I ever had, was like, when we evacuated." ~ Janelle. Well, Janelle, speaking just for myself, I am really glad you got to have fun! <333

- WAIT! WHO! "Got naked at the gay club for free drinks!" And where is this club???

- "Like, whether or not I want to admit it, Svetlana and I are the villains this season, so...they painted us up to be that." ~ Tyler. WOW. Tyler just got back 500 more points from me for exhibiting more self-awareness in that one moment than the entire season combined.

- And...Tyler's reaction to them having painted his face. He pontificated as per usual, with an unbeknownst-to-him scary face, and his interview: "...so at that point, I was like, I'm an asshole, I'm just gonna go to bed." -- AWESOME. WHEREFORE WERET THOU, THIS TYLER?

- Janelle...Janelle. You are still young. So as an older woman, can I just tell you? Your obvious jealousy of Svetlana? Unattractive! Add an ounce of true confidence to your person, and you are way hotter than her.

- Ohhh, okay. Paula Walnuts. AKA: The Entire Real World Season.

- Wait. What? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN, "dinner-plate nipples"? Do I want to know this.

- Okay...Halloween...Jose. Okay! Props to you for saying , "We looked like two really big douches," that was sort of funny

- Yeah, John is NOT that pretty a girl. Stop feeding his ego even more.

- WAIT! What was THAT! There was a pillow fight between Zach and Tyler, and I guess Zach's head ends up in Tyler's crotch? And all of a sudden, people are pissed off? Whatever. This is why I hate "The Real World."

- Yeah, John's That Guy.

- OMG! The Jessie Spano Freakout was reenacted by Tyler? DAMN! I'm sorry, Tyler. I really am. You rule harder than I ever knew!

- Hahaha "I would pass out and black out more than Paula would...I was just quiet about it." ~ Tyler

In closing: "The Shit They Should Have Seen": Why. WHY, Bunim/Murray. Why do you think we want to just see stupid fighting, sex, drunkenness, and bitchery all season? See, the thing is, we need a reason to care about these people, to tune in, and you're not giving us that. Skip making so and so the "villain," or the "victim," or whatever, and just show the damn footage. It's a lot more interesting that way.


©2006

Debbie Gibson's "Out of the Blue": A Review! (That rhymes.)

Now that I am done reviewing the redheaded rebel of the late '80s otherwise known as "Tiffany," it is time to focus on her towheaded arch-nemesis -- Debbie Gibson.

I can't lie to you. For me, it was not even a contest. While Tiffany sometimes just had the added edge that you needed after a tough day, Debbie Gibson was my soul sister. She was blonde! She was from Merrick! She had a high-pitched voice! I loved her immediately. Well, immediately after I stopped thinking that she and Lisa Lisa were one and the same. But THEN.

So, let's all kick back and look at her debut album, that came out when she was only 16 years old -- "Out of the Blue!"


1. Out of the Blue

Synopsis: She's in love -- out of the blue! It's like, whoa, where did THIS come from?

THEN: I really liked this song, but could kind of take it or leave it. Not that that stopped me from spending an entire afternoon transcribing the lyrics from the 45 I bought before the album was released. And from the cover, I learned that you could decorate your knee if you were wearing ripped jeans! Surprisingly difficult in practice.

NOW: I still like it. Still nothing that special, definitely not the greatest lyrics ever, but a decently strong pop song.

GRADE: B


2. Staying Together

Synopsis: Oh, you're leaving me? Well, I don't think so.

THEN: I wasn't crazy about this. It was catchy, and I didn't hate it, but I thought it was pretty repetitive, and also, as cheesy and easily suckered as I was back in the day, I must give myself retroactive props for never really getting down with that whole Stalker = Romantic Fortitude mentality.

NOW: It's definitely a fun song in that slightly manic, boppy kind of way. There are mad horns, and she sounds like she's running all over the place. And she gets all sassy, with talking: "Don't even think about it...think about it..." Credit for effort, but the fun-ness of the song is brought down by the dumb lyrics and irritating theme.

GRADE: C


3. Only In My Dreams

Synopsis: I totally messed up by dumping you, but now we're back together, yay! Ohhhh no, that was only in my dreams

THEN: This was the song that got me into Debbie Gibson. Her first single, she wrote it when she was 13 years old! It was very fun and nice for the end of 6th grade, when my soccer mom cut had grown out, school was over, and all was right with the world.

NOW: I've gotta say -- these are NOT terrible lyrics, especially for a 13-year-old. At all. They're actually kind of mentally complex, as far as these things go. I'm not kidding. And again, another high-energy, fun song. Plus, there are like, maracas! And that thing that you spin it around in your hand and it makes that waka-waka windy noise!

GRADE: A


4. Foolish Beat

Synopsis: Wow, I should not have left you. I'm so sad now awwww.

THEN: Okay. I was a 12-year-old girl. In 1987. There was no conceivable way in which I was NOT going to get mad goosebumps and think that this song wasn't the most beautiful, deepest thing I'd ever heard in my entire life. I mean, it was a) a ballad, b) from someone I already loved, and c) SAD. "I could never love again, now that we're apart." So true.

NOW: You know. The line, "There was no reason, just a foolish beat of my heart" -- that is NOT a bad line, all things considered, but it's the kind of line that nowadays some producer would be all "THE KIDS ARE GONNA THINK THAT IS WAY DEEEP" and it would be repeated ad nauseum throughout the entire song. This song, the title comes from that line, but it is only uttered once. I find that cool. And while it's not anywhere close to the caliber of "Lost in Your Eyes" (that came later), it's a decent ballad o' woe.

GRADE: A-


5. Red Hot

Synopsis: I just can't help myself -- you make me all crazy inside, that's how hot you are.

THEN: Dude. I lovvvvvvvvvvved this song. I was pretty much a goody-goody, and this was about as sexy as it got in my innocent little world.

NOW: I can't help it. I still love it. I still want to do my "sexy" dance and sing it in my bedroom. Plus, there's a nice transition from the verses to the chorus, which I'm a sucker for. Also, I must give props, because Debbie Gibson was the good girl pop princess -- and this song manages to be sexy, but not out of "character," you know? Plus, I am impressed that, although it repeats itself at the end more than a lot of her songs, she changes it up, it's not just droning on and on.

GRADE: A


6. Wake Up To Love

Synopsis: Don't you see how perfect we are for each other? What is your problem!

THEN: OH. This was my jam. Of course it was! It's all about Loving A Boy From Afar.

NOW: Yeah, this song is totally cheesy, but still cute. Not great, though. And there's this weird islandy musical thing going on that is distractingly accompanied by what sounds like someone knocking on the bottom of a screen door, when the regular door is open.

GRADE: C


7. Shake Your Love

Synopsis: You know how I'm kind of creepy? It's all just because I can't help it, I love you, and you make me want to DANCE!

THEN: Another song I spent an afternoon transcribing from a 45. But I really didn't care for it, because it didn't have the * deep * lyrics that the other songs did. Plus, by the time the album came out, I was sick of this single.

NOW: I underestimated this song. This song RULES! It's so much fun! The lyrics are terrible, but it doesn't matter, 'cause the song is so much fun, AND gives me magical beer pong powers! I suck at beer pong, but one night I was playing it in a bar, and this song came on, and all of a sudden, I started getting the balls in! Unprecedented! PLUS. Two bridges. That rocks.

GRADE: A


8. Fallen Angel

Synopsis: I have no effing idea.

THEN: Another song that I thought was extremely sexy. But I don't remember much about it.

NOW: WOW, this is '80s. Like late-night Hot Skates '80s. Not United Skates of America. This is too bad ass for United Skates. Okay, well, I really think this is an instance where Debbie's pretty, harmless voice hurts the song. It's just not a good fit. This song needs somebody with a big, raspy voice to balance out all the craziness in the "music." Someone like...Tiffany.

GRADE: D


9. Play The Field

Synopsis: Don't settle, girlfriend!

THEN: I remember not being crazy about this song, but using it to help me get over my unrequited love(s) in 8th grade.

NOW: This song SUCKS. WTF? I can't even explain what's going on with the music, in the background. It sounds like someone manically banging away on a xylophone, but like, instead of a xylophone, it's a drum machine. Does that even make any sense? I think this song is driving me to madness.

GRADE: F


10. Between The Lines

Synopsis: I know you love me because...um...I don't know why, I just know, okay?

THEN: I loved this song. After the crazy horror of the past couple of songs, this was a welcome reprieve. Nothing that special, but still sweet and pretty.

NOW: Yeahhhhh. Whoever picked the order of the songs on this album was smoking mad crack. This song is OKAY, but really nothing special at all. Plus, like, enough with the horns!

GRADE: C



©2006

"World Trade Center"

I've been doing a lot of thinking. Trying to figure out exactly what it is that deeply disturbs me with regard to the movie "World Trade Center," besides the obvious. I don't like when I can't pinpoint, and then articulate, how I feel, what I believe, and why. And when it comes to September 11th, I kind of...just can't . I can't wrap my brain around it; I can't compartmentalize it. I cry whenever it comes up, but my heart and my brain are like, suspended, desperately trying to make ANY kind of sense and/or peace with it. I think about the day, which I can still picture exactly in my mind, and I can't believe that it was a day that I lived, the worst day of my entire life bar none, but so, so much worse for so many others. I can't believe that day wasn't a movie. So for it to BE a movie...I just don't understand it. I can't understand it. I really would like to. But I can't. I see commercials, and it's like, "NO, this isn't right, it wasn't a soft-lens montage set to a Coldplay song -- which, does anyone else find it REALLY inapropriate that it's the same song that was in the "King Kong" commercials, and no, I'm not trying to be funny -- it was REAL. There were people jumping out of those buildings. My cousin got blood on his shirt that fell from the sky. My friend had a memorial service for a man whose body was never found.

I know this is true of every historical event that has been made into a movie, but this is just too soon. I'm sure there are good intentions from the people who made the movie, but I just don't get it. You want to donate money to the families? Make another movie and donate to them from that! The movie needs to be made because the heroes' stories need to be told? Why? Why now? Why like this?

It's just too soon to be trying to package that monstrous day away like that. It's too big, it's just too much.And why are movies about September 11th getting made before we can even get a memorial? What is THAT?

Someone was saying the other day -- I forget who, I'm sorry -- that s/he hated how every time something happened on the news now, it has a "title," like the thwarted airline attacks last week. Not a day had gone by, and it was "Terror in the Skies!" It's not "Terror in the Skies!" It's a day of horror that thankGodfully wasn't. How long passed after the towers fell before September 11th became "9/11" and worst of all, "911!" You know? I understand that as human beings we need to deal, but sometimes life just throws something really freakishly large and unwieldy at us, and much as we'd like to, we just can't slap a bow and a catchphrase on it and tuck it into storage. Life doesn't work that way, and for us to presume otherwise is horrifyingly dangerous. Just seeing "World Trade Center" in quotes like that -- it just looks wrong.

So those are my thoughts. But what I really wanted to do was link to this essay, because it's amazing. I read Tomato Nation before the attacks, and I credit Sars (the writer) with, not quite singlehandedly but almost, getting me back into the city after September 11th. I spent the day trapped there, thinking I was literally never going home again, because I was trapped on an island that was under attack, and the second I stepped into Queens after getting off the 59th Street Bridge, I wanted to literally kiss the ground. The idea of going BACK to the city seemed just, like, I couldn't begin to fathom it. I was paralyzed with fear. But Sars's essay, knowing she was still living in the city despite the attacks, and she'd been up close to the Towers (I was in midtown) was -- not comforting, exactly, but encouraging. Between that and her advice column...she has an advice section, and there were SO many people writing in just like, "What do I do? How do I deal with this?" and she got outside herself, her own trauma, to help other people, and to basically say, "We survived, and we're in this together, and I don't know HOW we're going to get through it, but we are." And one day, she quoted "The Shawshank Redemption": "Get busy livin', or get busy dyin'." Something about that...it was like a needle pricking through the paralysis. I went back to work the next day.

Maybe this movie will be healing for some. Maybe it will be healing for many. But my initial reaction, and still my reaction after thinking, and reading, and digesting, is that it is just too soon for such a polish to be put on that day. There hasn't even been another Tuesday, September 11th since 2001. I just think that maybe we're too anxious to literally and figuratively put that day on the shelf, and I don't think we can, or should. Not yet.

The One Spice Girl I Am Not

Many times, people will ask me about sports. Or they will try to engage me in conversations about sports. Or -- and this is the worst offense of all -- they will invite me over to ostensibly hang out together and just put on sports. The last one is the most heinous offense of them all, because sports games NEVER END. Now, don't get me wrong! I have gotten into sports before, and I do desire to share things that are important to my theoretical loved ones. But don't assume that I have any background information on the subject.

So for your convenience, I have compiled a list of everything I know about sports and/or how they have played a role in my life:


1. I was at a few of the '86 World Series games and made cookies from scratch for each game.

2. Kevin Elster is hot.

3. Mookie Wilson rules.

4. Keith Hernandez was on "Seinfeld."

5. I was in love with Ron Darling.

6. Gary Carter is very nice, and I think he was the catcher?

7. I met Howard Johnson 3 times, twice at my school's chapel because his daughter went there, and once when we had Saturday practice at one of the cheerleader's houses. We practiced in her bitchin' mirrored garage/workout room, then came in to take a break, and lo and behold, Howard Johnson was in her kitchen, chilling! He was very nice.

8. Although I cried when the Mets lost the '88 playoffs, I was a bit mollified by the fact that Orel Hersheiser was a REALLY good pitcher.

9. My brother and I would ride our bikes to Stage every day in the summer of '89 to buy baseball stickers.

10. Litrell Spriewell is insane, and kind of hot.

11. And was definitely on the Knicks, although I don't know if he still is or not.

12. Ben Roethlisberger is from the Steelers and did something recently to piss *B*O*B* off.

13. The Steelers won the Superbowl this year despite, I think, a curse of some nature?

14. Likewise, the Rangers won a Stanley Cup a couple of years ago, so Kris Breien can't keep chanting "19! 40!" or he can, but it doesn't pack the same punch.

15. There is a kid at the beginning of Debbie Gibson's "Electric Youth" video who looks, as my brother pointed out, a lot like a young Pat LaFontaine.

16. Instant replays at the bar have caused at least two astonishingly airheaded displays on my part.

17. I told Sean I'd root for a team because he has their jersey and is a fan, and I am still totally going to root for them as soon as I am reminded as to who they are and what they do. Their name begins with a "B."

18. Oh, in addition to Ben R.'s being on the Steelers and pissing off *B*O*B*, he is also a quarterback.

19. Soccer is controversial.

20. DARRRRRRYYYYYYLLLLLLLL!

21. I went to a bunch of Islanders games when my dad's company had a skybox, but I was too young and stupid to appreciate the free alcohol.

22. I am not a Yankees fan for a few reasons, the biggest of which being that I like to feel needed, ya know? They don't need me; they're like Johnny Depp. Even though Johnny Depp would totally be into me if he got to know me. All the quizzes say so.

23. Luke from "Gilmore Girls" used to play baseball professionally. And he also guest starred on "Seinfeld!"

24. Harlem Globetrotters games are a lot of fun.

25. I could wear nothing but hockey jerseys for the rest of my life and be completely happy.



©2006





UPDATE: WHAT I KNOW NOW:


26. The Giants won the Superbowl this year! And it was very exciting! I made snacks and beer for the people who understood exactly why it was very exciting. I discovered Flying Dog beer that night though, and got to drink red wine from a metal chalice, so that's good enough for me.

27. Lots of people have been busted for steroids, which is of course shocking in such a culture of personal responsibility and ethics.





Sports questions for y'all:

~ Is The Mighty Ducks the only team named after fiction?

~ Are you really that into Superbowl commercials? Would you be if there were no beer?

~ Did you ever throw Mike & Ikes at Barry Bonds, or was that just my brother and his friends?

An AIM Tale

(Screen names have been changed to protect the innocent.)

Dan: So listen to this

Dan: i went to the deli and the line was stupid long so i was like screw this and went to quiznos

Judi: ANOTHER GREAT STORY!!!!

Dan: while i am waiting on line the lady in front of me asks me about my car

Dan: she is very friendly and is like do you like the vibe is it comfy yada yada yada. I wanted one but my husband out voted me and we ended up with a camry yada yada.

Dan: And i am trying not to come off like i really don't want to talk to anyone and am humoring her conversation until she orders her sandwich and i order mine

Judi: did you tell her it was named Rator

Judi: ok

Dan: then while we are waiting for the toasting she turns to me and says "so would you like to go on a date with my daughter?"

Judi: :-o

Judi: :-D

Judi: awesome!

Judi: did you say, "only if she's JUST LIKE YOU bamp chicka bamp bamp?"

Dan: at which point I have a hard time hiding the look of shock on my face. when she pretends she is just kidding "not really, i am just half kidding" she says

Judi: she likkkkkkked youuuuuuuu

Judi: :-*

Judi: it's just like that mtv show!

Judi: date my mom!

Judi: no i'm not kidding.

Judi: so what did you say

Dan: Now i am unable to formulate words at this point but she continues about how her daughter would kill her if she was here, and plays it off because she obviously thinks she has freaked me out.

Dan: and i am just kidding back without committing to anything short of that okay go away strange lady tone.

Dan: and while i am paying i can see her on her cell phone out of the corner of my eye and when she hangs up she jokingly says "she is actually on her way here now, so don't tell her i said anything or she will hate me and move out."

Dan: so i proceeded to wolf down my sandwich and get out of there before she actually did show up.

Judi: hahahahahah oh MAN!!!!!!!!!!!

Judi: you should have stayed.

Dan: I was so in shock that it actually was happening that i couldn't think of anything, it just made my lunch awkward

Judi: hahahah

Dan: the sentence "my fiancee might mind if i did" in response to the date question formulated but never actually made it to the table because she was talking too fast

Judi: hahahah

Judi: that's amazing

Dan: now isn't that story much better than my lunch story earlier... this is why i am not allowed to go to lunch alone. mothers of three hit on me, and that is just not right.

Judi: can i make this conversation into a blog?

Dan: sure as long as you agree to protect my identity

Judi: really? okay!!!

Dan: you can title it. "i got hit on by a mother of three whilst i waited for my chicken carbonarra"

Judi: No.

Dan: :(

Blonde moment #147

"Oh! Is it called 'Airborne' because airplanes have a lot of germs on them? So you use it in the air?"

My Life Soundtrack

Okay, I finally have it -- my life's soundtrack! Or one of them. I know it's sorta like a survey, but I worked hard on this (I know, I know, but soundtracking is one of my passions!), so it's going in the blog. I tried to really picture the "scene" in my mind and pick a song that would be good for it, while also trying to make a cohesive "album." I'm just bitter that my computer is broken and I can't make a physical CD

Opening credits
I Predict ~ Sparks

Waking up
Plane Crash in C ~ Rilo Kiley

Average day
Wishing Heart ~ Lisa Loeb

First date
Stay Now ~ Jem

Falling in love
It's Only Time ~ Magnetic Fields

Love scene
Sea Song ~ Doves

Fight scene
Spookshow Baby ~ Rob Zombie

Breaking up
The Dangling Conversation ~ Simon & Garfunkel

Getting back together
It's Magic ~ Dinah Washington

Secret love
You Don't Have To Say You Love Me ~ Dusty Springfield

Life's okay
Mint Car ~ The Cure

Mental breakdown
Once, A Glimpse ~ Maximo Park

Driving
Fire ~ The Sounds

Learning a lesson
These Days ~ The Rentals

Deep thought
I Want It All ~ Depeche Mode

Flashback
Second Skin ~ The Chameleons

Partying
Zen And The Art Of Breaking Everything In This Room ~ World Inferno Friendship Society

Happy dance
Streams of Whiskey ~ The Pogues

Regretting
Here ~ Pavement

Long night alone
Beside You In Time ~ Nine Inch Nails

Death scene
Down To The Well ~ Pixies

Closing credits
Textbook ~ We Are Scientists